Tuesday, 13 March 2012

If You Don't Have Anything Nice To Say ......

don't say anything at all ! (As a child I listened to the Bambi record I don't know how many times and can't remember how many times I have thought it since then.)

Recently there seem to be quite a few occasions where I have read comments from people and thought to myself 'Why did they write that ?'.  It was mean spirited or unkind or rude.  People, if you haven't got anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all.

When I write a blog post, or post on FB or twitter - if you don't like what I (or anyone else for that matter) is saying - close out of the post and either don't come back or come back knowing that you may not like what I have written.  If you don't like what I post on FB or twitter - defriend me or stop following me.  At the end of the day, this is my blog and, while I hope that I don't offend people or post anything that is totally out there, it is still my blog.  It is also the reason that I don't get on with my brother - he stuck his nose in where it wasn't needed, didn't give me a chance to say anything, and maybe 4 years later, I still can't get over it.  Rightly or wrongly, it hurts that he listened to someone else and didn't listen to anything I had to say.  The incident I had written about was what happened - I didn't make it up, I didn't exaggerate it and I can't change it - what has happened, has happened and hopefully at some point I will get over it.

My blog is where I go because I like to type - and there are only so many letters / e-mails I can write to people.  I like to put down in words (not very well because I am not as eloquent as other bloggers that I read, I acknowledge that and I am OK with that) things that have happened or how I feel or what gets me up or when things get me down.  I find typing very cathartic - have no idea why, but I do.  So when I read nasty comments it really gets to me because we all blog for different reasons - but that isn't to say that it gives anyone the right to make a derogatory remark about what has been written, criticise the choices or decisions made - until you have walked a mile in that bloggers shoes - keep your nasty comments to yourself.

In all likelihood, the people that this post is targeted at will not read it but I feel better for having got it off my chest because it annoys me when I see it happening on other blogs and it has been worrying me that people are not considerate of others.

Onto happier things - A is on his way home and should be home in a couple of hours.  I am very excited and can't wait to see him again.  At this stage we don't know when/if he is going to have to go away again.  Tomorrow he is having some cancers cut out of his nose and ear and then is off work until Monday so he will have a good couple of days at home to rest up - this past job in Gladstone has been physically draining, largely due to the heat and humidity and he is really looking forward to a short break - I'm just sorry I can't take any days off to be with him.

Have the best Wednesday possible !

TFTD : Life is too precious to quibble over details.


  1. oh, honey. Im so sorry that the haters are hating and invading your space! its horrible, and hurtful and hard - especially when you pour your heart out, and by nature are such a kind and generous woman.
    im glad that A is on his way home to you tonight - i hope that you enjoy a wonderful week together - even though he will be recovering, it will be so nice for you just to have him there xx

  2. A pox on them I say.
    Love you heaps

  3. I shall be sending my social media expert friend, Jean, over to your site to have a look. Your post is JUST what peeves her...people posting things or saying things they shouldn't. And I totally agree with you on that. I've seen a lot of nasty comments around lately and wonder if these people are this cruel when face to face with other human beings. GREAT points!

  4. Thank you Diane for introducing me! I write a blog about Social media matters, manners & madness http://www.simplysquirrelfood.com.
    As far as I'm concerned, there is never a good reason for someone to leave nasty comments on blogs and other sites. But I think we also have to take ownership for what we write. I have a close relative who posts constantly about the troubles and hardships of her life. When someone offers up a suggestion about how she could change things, she gets defensive and tells people to quit judging her. Well...they wouldn't have much to judge if she didn't put it all out there. There is also the problem that people can read things differently than the way it was originally meant. I've gotten into trouble with that waaaay too many times. I think I'm being really clever and cute with some wisecrack comment and somebody else reads it as a derogatory slam. I guess the best advice is to read and re-read everything we write with an eye on how other people will interpret it. When it comes to really personal things we're probably better off keeping it private. The solution that works best for me is I have a super-secret non-public blog that I use like a personal diary when I want to rant, because like you, I find it therapeutic to write out my thoughts. And that way I don't have to put up with hearing what anybody else thinks. Thanks for letting me share my thoughts! Best of all to you.

  5. OMG I had no idea this had happened. I can't stand it when they do this, it is so much easier just to unfriend, dilike whatever - weho has the time to hate?? Seriously!! Just lets the haters keep on hating, hopefully they will get bored if no one pays them any attention. Big Hugs hun xx


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