For those who have been following my blog for a while, you will know that lately life has been more than a little difficult for me. The menopausal symptoms that I have been suffering with started to improve but then about 2-3 months ago they started to worsen and they have just been sending me down the slope to feeling like I am going insane.
As I said, after the first couple of months things did start to improve - the itches stopped, the hot flushes and night sweats eventually improved and the anxiety attacks were few and far between.
2-3 months ago things turned around - the anxiety attacks became more frequent, my mood swings were unbelievable and I wondered whether I would have a family 12 months into the future.
Before Christmas I have noticed that my weight was starting to creep up. We had a very quiet Christmas - especially food wise with no chocolates, Christmas pudding / cake, mince pies - none of the normal Christmas things that we have. I didn't even drink much - maybe twice. After Christmas I noticed I had a good loss for 2 weeks - and then the kilos started to creep up, and up, and up. My exercising wasn't as good as it had been as I was still trying to recover from hurting my back during Warrior Dash and my knee had been giving me some trouble as well. But, I was still getting out there and doing something. There was no reason why I shouldn't be losing weight.
After talking to my osteo and telling him about my weight gain after cutting out sugar, dairy and wheat, he strongly recommended that I see my doctor again. So I did, because as I said before, I was starting to wonder just how long my family would put up with me.
She looked at my blood tests, suggested I see a psychologist and told me in no uncertain terms that I couldn't expect to have the body of a 20yo when I was nearly 50 and really just dismissed me out of hand. I told her that I completely understood that and didn't want the body of a 20yo - but I also didn't want to working my butt off and having my weight (and cms) go up. To say that I was upset about it would be an understatement. I really felt like I wasn't worth much at all.
Then I started to 'chat' to another blogger who knew exactly what I was talking about when I mentioned anxiety attacks because she has suffered from them for many years and has learned how to overcome them. What a great feeling that was - knowing that there was someone out there who 'got' me.
A friend at work suggested I see someone who specialises in menopause and I said I would if she could give me the name of someone to see. She googled it and came up with a name and number for me. I called them and made an appointment for two days time. I went to her (she is an elderly lady who just reminds me of Maxine - the cartoon character - so I have been calling her Dr Maxine) - the appointment wasn't very long but, man it was so good to talk to her. She knew exactly what I was talking about and she knew what I needed to do. First up, I had to go and get another blood test because the last one I had was in July last year. I made a follow up appointment with her for Tuesday last week but then we got stuck in Stanthorpe and I had to cancel. When we got home later in the week, I called and made an appointment for Monday morning.
I went to see Dr Maxine - what a great way to start the week - she printed off the results and went through them with me (summarised version) :
thyroid - good
testosterone - good
oestrogen - extremely bad
progesterone - extremely bad
vitamin D - not very good (I asked how this could be as I am in the sun on and off on the weekend - she said that while I am getting sufficient vitamin D - going on how brown I am - my body is not metabolising it like it should. Apparently there are many people on the Gold Coast who are vitamin D deficient.)
I just burst out crying - I was so relieved that there was a definite reason for why I have been feeling like I have. She patted my shoulder and said "It's OK Lovey - we'll work it out. This probably won't fix everything, but it will go a long way to making you feel much better." Now at $150 per appointment, I wasn't sure how many appointments I would need BUT now, knowing that she has discovered a reason and has given me some light at the end of the tunnel - I would pay ANYTHING to see her.
If there is anyone who is suffering from menopausal symptoms - please know this - you don't have to put up with it !!!! Contact me if you want to know the lady I am seeing - I think she may treat people interstate via telephone appointments - and if she doesn't, she may be able to put you in touch with someone in your area. She certainly has been around many years and knows what she is doing. She told me today that she is nearly 70 (told A I thought that she was older than that !!!) so she has been through it and understands exactly what I am saying.
Here's to the beginning of better things. I went out walking tonight, came home and did a routine of varied crunches and then planked for 1:10:06min. My fit journal has been completed for the week and I am ready to tackle anything !!
And, because it is Tuesday, I am linking in with Jess from Essentially Jess for #IBOT.
TFTD : If you give in to your fears, you will have a harder time looking at yourself in the mirror.