Monday, 18 February 2013
I Must Confess
This week I am linking in with Kirsty at My Home Truths for I Must Confess. While I know that sometimes this is done, tongue in cheek, for me it is a hard admission to make but, in the interest of staying honest on my blog and acknowledging where I am, here goes (and maybe, just maybe - it will help me be kinder to myself because sometimes you just have to roll with the punches !!!)
Last week I got A to take my big clothes out of the garage roof. He brought down the boxes that have clothes in from size 10-22. I pulled out the size 16 clothes. I put them. They fitted. They were more comfortable than the size 12-14 clothes that I have been wearing for the past couple of weeks. So for a few days this week I went to work in comfortable clothes. That made me happy because by the time I have driven for 30 mins to get to work, I generally get out feeling like I have been cut in half.
Last week my BIL asked me if I wanted to join him running with some people at 6am ON SATURDAY MORNING. I said not bloody likely because those of you that know me, know that I am so not a morning personb!!!! But we were out to dinner with them on Friday night and I said that I would get my clothes ready and if I was awake I would go. I asked A to just "Hhhmmm" me if he was awake from about 5.15am and if I was awake I would get up. He was fast asleep but I woke at 5.22am. I lay there for a while and then thought that I really should just get up and do it ! So I did. Got dressed and called BIL and he was just leaving so he came and picked me up and off we went. It was really nice - such a great time of the day to run. I truly wish I was a morning person and could do it more often !!!!!
I had a reasonable run but when I got home to A I said that I needed to get some bigger exercising clothes as I just felt so uncomfortable in the ones I had. It broke my heart to have to say I needed to go and buy bigger clothes - not only because of the money that it cost but because who wants to be exercising and eating well and putting on weight ? Not me for sure - but that is what I am dealing with so best I accept it and be kind to myself.
So yesterday we went to KMart and Big W and I got two pairs of pants for $15 each and three tops for $8 each. At least they will keep me going and hopefully the weight will start to come off instead of going on and I can go back to my current exercise clothes - and then have to buy smaller clothes !!
I just wish I knew what I could do about my weight and not feel like I am at the mercy of my body / biological clock / hormones. In the meantime I am going to do my absolute best to be kind to myself and love myself even though my body is not behaving in a very loving manner back to me !!!
Have a great week !
TFTD : If you aren’t being yourself, you aren’t truly living – you’re merely existing.