Tuesday, 8 November 2011

Disappointed but still Determined !

As I have mentioned before, I am a scale whore.  I live and die (well not literally) by the number that comes up on the scale when I stand on it every single morning.  When I am in denial, I am not a scale whore, I do not step on the scale and, unless you offered to pay me squillions of $, I won't step on the scale.  My eating and exercise regime at the moment is partly to see a number I am happy with on the scale and partly to make sure that I am as healthy as I can be for my age.

Oh what I would give for this to be the number that I saw on the scale when I got on in the morning
(Having said that I don't want to have to lose a leg to see that number !!!!)

I have been doing L&E for nearly 6 weeks and my weight, during the week, is not going the way it is supposed to - it is not going down, it isn't even staying the same, it keeps going up.  I have even changed to 7 days of L&E rather than 5 days of L&E and just watching what I eat on the weekend and on Monday, my weight was up 1.2kgs from Thursday - HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN ?  How can I have 4 days of eating less than 1200 calories and I put on 1.2kg ?  A says - with all the exercise you are building muscle which is heavier than fat - but my clothes aren't any looser than they used to be.   My measurements don't appear to have got less so what is going on ?  I know that if I keep it up, I will see the results eventually but it is so demoralising.  Last year I lost about 27kgs in 6 months doing L&E and less exercise than I am doing now.  This time around I am exercising more and the weight seems to be taking longer to come off.

I spoke to the osteopath when I saw him this morning and he has recommended that I see a naturopath to see if everything is functioning like it should in case there is another reason why I seem to be battling with my weight so will see when I can get an appointment (I have been warned that it will be a while before I can get in to see her).

Yesterday I went for a run on the long loop (4.9km) and felt really good during the run but was absolutely devastated when I uploaded my time to find that it was 7'05"/km.  When I ran the same loop on Friday, I ran it in 7'03"/km.  And, when I ran the 3.3km loop on Wednesday I did it in 6'58"/km.  I was talking to A about it when we were in the car last night and was saying to him that I can't work it out - I would have to be the LEAST competitive person on this earth that I know of and yet I get really upset with myself because my runs are more than the 7'00"/km.  I mean at the end of the day, I am talking about less than 35 secs over just under 5 kms but it is really getting to me.  If I knew why it was so important to me, it would help because at the end of the day, it really isn't a big deal but for some reason it has taken on a life of it's own in my head and it is sitting there like this big black cloud waiting to pour on my parade if I can't get under bloody 7mins !

But, I am determined to stay on track with my food and my exercise because I know that if I keep on with it I will see the results.  I just have to be PATIENT (not a word that is normally found in my vocabulary !!!)  The other night I was up in the middle of the night and I went onto the computer rather than into the pantry to see what I could eat - I did feel like that was a win for me.  I am the worst midnight snack eater although now that my sleeping habits are becoming more normal, I am not awake as much during the night as I used to be which is good because that was when I did a lot of eating - often mindless eating because I was the only one in the family awake and what better time to eat a whole heap of cr*p when nobody is around to see just exactly how much I can shovel into my face !

Tonight there is no training - we are off to see Kings of Leon.  The concert was originally in Jan or Feb this year but due to the drummer having to have an operation on his shoulder, we got bumped to the end of their tour.  And, to make matters worse, they have put on an extra show - on the Gold Coast - instead we get to schlep all the way to the Brisbane Entertainment Centre at Boondall !!!!!  But, I have heard that it is a great concert so hopefully worth the schelp.

Have an absolutely terrific Tuesday !

Love, hugs and positive energy.

TFTD : Everybody get so much information all day long that they lose their common sense - Gertrude Stein


  1. i drink loads of water. i find it helps the cravings. you sound like you are doing great. getting out and going for a run does make you feel so much better. i do it during my lunch break at work. have fun at the concert!

  2. Glad the concert rocked!!

    Try not to let the scales get to you. Concentrate on feeling happy and healthy :) xx


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